Every year around our anniversary, the man that married my husband and I will call to check in. I have known him most of my life, plus he’s a fellow creative, so it feels far less like a pastor calling and much more like catching up with an old friend.

He asked how I was and I launched into my usual spiel about a great work life — “busy and challenging, but it keeps me on my toes; I love it!” — along with a few funny anecdotes. He laughed and asked again in a “no, how are you really” sort of way.

I paused for a beat and said, “How much time do you have?”

In the most productive way I knew, I crammed 10 months of reading, therapy, and self-discovery into 15 minutes. I took a deep breath and trying to lighten the mood I said, “…you asked!”

He told me he was PROUD of me.

Crickets.

“No matter what you actually believe,” he continued. “Here’s the truth.”

I stayed quiet on the line while he ran down a list of traits he admired in me. He went through them one by one – standout characteristics bestowed upon me for a special purpose, he noted.

At this point, I had already scheduled my last blog post citing the importance of seeing others and here I was reaping the benefits of being seen! Oh, how my heart was encouraged!

I continue to wrestle with my productive passion. My heart continues to break for those who are falling prey to the lies of comparison; those who struggle with the detrimental effects of diet culture; those who are coasting through life and missing the real magic that lies inside of them!

This question has been a big game changer for me: What if you changed your perspective from having something to prove to having something to give? What if our circumstances and our stories become the bridge to connect us to others?

Call me a dreamer, but I think this can change the world.

Help us to love our neighbor,
To see the sacred specialness in them
The way we long for others to see it in us.
Give us this day an imagination,
A place in our soul where we can make and believe
Untethered to kingdoms that have lost their will to wonder.
Lead us to our inner child, a place where we belong
In tennis shoes scuffed by curiosity
Where a sureness quietly blossoms in not knowing everything.
And deliver us from the things that hide us
That kidnap this gift, the good feeling it is to know we’re alive.
-CJ Casciotta, Get Weird